Tuesday, 1 February 2011

£21m Luiz ready to adapt to crap football

Brazilian David Luiz, the new Chelsea signing, is ready for the challenges of the Premier League, a league noted for its fast pace, nice kits, big crowds and the substandard quality of its football.
"It is a major challenge for me but I am determined and confident in my ability to adapt to this excellent league, and I look forward to meeting my new team-mates," the Brazilian defender said. “I am expecting to have my legs and knees damaged quite quickly following a unnecessarily brutal ‘welcome-to-England’ tackle from an English defender and to lose all those skills I have worked upon since I was three.”
"David Luiz is one of the great defensive prospects in world football, and already a Brazilian international," said the Blues chief executive Ron Gourlay. "but I am sure playing in the Premier League will put an end to all that. Fancy Dan players are soon taught to forget the ball and concentrate on the opposing player."
The deal takes Chelsea's spending in January to over £70m, having landed Fernando Torres in a British record deal worth about £50m and Luiz will follow in the footsteps of many exceptional foreign players who have come to England and become crap such as Robhino and Torres. Apart from the huge sums of money he’ll be earning, Luiz said there were other reasons for joining Chelsea: “I really look forward to playing Grimsby Town or Yeovil in the League Cup on a bobbling pitch and having to resort to the long ball game.”

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